War is Hell
by DarkNight18
Summary: Her hair was a mess with Cottage Cheese, and her big brown eyes were brimming with tears, but to him she'd never looked more beautiful.


**A.N.: My very first GMW fanfic.**

**Disclaimer: I own nothing of GMW, which belongs to Disney.**

_**War Is Hell...**_

'_War is Hell,'_ his father had told him one Sunday afternoon, a good seven hours after Mr. Friar had returned from his tour.

Lucas had been curious as to what it was like in the battlefield, not that he ever wanted to become a soldier that is, and to this day he never could fully grasp his father's words.

Until now.

It had all started about a week before.

He and Riley were on a date, and had decided to go see a movie.

He'd made an off-handed comment about the character of the female lead, which had earned him a wide eyed look of surprise from his girlfriend of three months, and as he looked back on it now, he is pretty sure she had misread his words, not that he could really remember them, as he dodged a well aimed cheesecake thrown by none other than Missy Bradford.

The next day in school, he found himself yanked into Mr. Matthews History classroom, and met with furious smouldering glare from not only Cory Matthews and Farkle, but about seventeen more male students he'd seen around school.

He asked them what was wrong, and was dumbfounded when Mr. Matthews explained as best he could the events of the night before when Riley had returned home from their date, if not for the constant interruptions from Farkle, who was so furious, he was only able to stutter out a single word, _'FARKLE! F-FA-FA-FA-FARKLE!'._

Apparently, Riley had retailed the comment he'd made in the theatre to both Maya, and Mrs. Matthews, whom, just like Riley, misread the words, and began screaming in outrage about sexist men. Cory and Farkle had interrupted with the intent of calming the women down, but had ended up saying something that shall forever remain a mystery to Lucas, which had been misread by the females, which had then lead to Cory sleeping on the couch, or wide-awake, and shaking in fear all night as he clutched a paintball gun to his chest to protect him from three of the most dangerous women he'd ever known.

Lucas still had no idea how it could be so bad. Convinced that if they just talked to the girls, maybe they could straighten the whole thing out.

But Mr. Matthews simply shook his head, and told Lucas it was too late.

Lucas frowned deeper, but had then been grabbed by a frantic, wide eyed Farkle Minkus, who screamed,

"IT'S A BATTLE OF THE SEXES FRIAR! A BATTLE OF THE SEXES!"

And not a second later, Farkle's blue eyes rolled back into his head, and his body fell limp into Mr. Matthews awaiting arms, as he continued to mumble, '_farkle, farkle, farkle...'_

Lucas had looked back up at Mr. Matthews face wide eyed, and Cory once again shook his head sadly.

"Maya spread what you did around school like wild fire. This school is now a warzone in the battle of the sexes."

And a warzone it had become.

In the week that followed, classes were filled with tension, and the male populace of the school had been basically burned alive by the glares of the female populace in class, but none more than Lucas Friar himself, seen by the women as both the instigator, and ring leader of the males.

The hallways were a whole other situation. Pranks, spitball attacks, name calling, even physical fights, most instigated by Maya Hart herself, overtook the building in between classes.

Lucas had tried to talk to Riley, but she had none of it, believing his words that night to have been nothing more than sexist, and was then escorted away by Maya, and none other than Missy Bradford, who had formed an alliance with the two, which quickly formed into a friendship, leaving Lucas behind and backed into a corner by several females, spitballs at the ready.

Lucas awoke twenty minutes later in Mr. Matthews classroom, an found himself cleaned of female saliva. Farkle, and small group of soldiers had been scouting the halls for Lucas when they'd found him unconscious the janitors closet, then brought him back, and cleaned him up.

After that day, Lucas decided if the women wanted a war, he'd give them a war.

Using the tactical military skills his own father had bestowed upon him, Lucas showed no restraint. The men fought back against the women, and oh were the battles great. Though Lucas was surprised to find that his tactical genius apparently scared even Farkle.

That Friday, Mrs. Matthews had come into the school cafeteria to give Riley something she'd left at home. A moment later she's ended up bumping into Mr. Matthews, and the two began to scream. Lucas wasn't sure who had said what, but all he knew was that Mr. Matthews picked up a Sloppy Joe, and threw it right at his wife's back.

All was silent as she turned around to glare at her husband who stood firm in his place, until she cried out.

"FOOD FIGHT!"

And all hell broke loose.

Tables turned over, screams of war filled the air, food flew in all directions, and oh it was brilliant.

The boys took one side of the room, with Mr. Matthews as their leader, and the girls took the other, Mrs. Matthews their leader.

A good hour and a half later, and the food continued to fly. Teachers had joined in, the men against the women, and even the principal and his secretary joined.

Many brave soldiers from either side had taken the fight the fight to the middle of the room. Some of which had met gruesome fates. Farlkle himself had been taken down by the combined forces of Missy and Maya, and now he laid beneath a mountain of cols laugh.

Looking over his table, Lucas found Riley standing over a fallen Missy, and watched her take down three of his soldiers with a single Chicken Pot Pie.

Growling at the loss of three of his soldiers, Lucas grabbed a large chunk of Angel Cake, threw himself over his wooden guard, and ran towards his ex.

She glared as he approached, picking up a Sloppy Joe in the process, and just as the two leaned back, preparing to launch their edible weapons, they froze.

What were they doing? Not a week before, they were in love. They were boyfriend and girlfriend. They lived to see the other smile. And here they stood now, in the middle of a battle of the sexes, perfectly ready to nail the other with food, and for what? Lucas couldn't even remember what he had said that night, and if she were to tell the truth, neither could Riley.

They'd been so caught up in the heat of war, they'd completely forgotten why it had started at all. Even worse, they'd forgotten their love for one another.

And with that, Lucas finally understood his father's words.

_'War is Hell, son...'_

Indeed it is, Lucas concluded.

The battle had damningly almost destroyed many friendships, and relationships, Lucas and Riley's for one. It had divided the school for the worse, and he was pretty sure Farkle had gotten a 'B' in science he was so stressed.

Slowly lowering his arms, he looked her up and down. Her hair was a mess with Cottage Cheese, and her big brown eyes were brimming with tears, but to him she'd never looked more beautiful.

The Angel Cake fell from his hand, just as the Sloppy Joe slid passed her beautifully delicate fingers, and they rushed forward.

"I love you!" she smiled a beautiful watery smile as her tears gave way, and she threw her arms around his neck, standing on the tips of her toes.

"I love you too!" he smiled as he dipped his head down, wrapping one arm around her waist, while his left hand slid up into her sweet smelling, perfectly soft, Cottage Cheese filled hair, and they kissed. They kissed a long, deep kiss of need, filling it with every ounce of love and passion they possessed.

War may be Hell...

...but love is something else.

_**The end.**_

**A.N.: Hope you liked it, and please review.**


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